Republicans shouldn't have to choose between two men that look almost exactly alike with the same intentions: to cut taxes.
So I'm quite proud to announce that earlier this year, a massive genetic experiment was undertaken, to combine the DNA of both men. Applied with massive amounts of human growth factor hormones (HGH) and given an intense, accelerated learning program, with specialized ebonics software and hooked on phonics, we've created a man of the people.
His name is Rick Romney, and he's running for President of the United States of America in 2012.
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