That Time When The Emperor Contradicted Himself

The truth is, The Emperor contradicts himself all the time. But here's an especially egregious example of contradictions because it is captured fully in writing from his desk.

On January 23, 2017, The Emperor issued a Memorandum creating a federal hiring freeze. It was quite specific, too:

"This hiring freeze applies to all executive departments and agencies regardless of the sources of their operational and programmatic funding, excepting military personnel."

Two days later, The Emperor signed an Executive Order (EO 13767) to ramp up "The Wall" with Mexico. In it, he issued a demand to increase federal employment:

"Sec. 8. Additional Border Patrol Agents. Subject to available appropriations, the Secretary, through the Commissioner of U.S. Customs and Border Protection, shall take all appropriate action to hire 5,000 additional Border Patrol agents, and all appropriate action to ensure that such agents enter on duty and are assigned to duty stations as soon as is practicable."

On the same day, The Emperor also signed another Executive Order (EO 13768) to increase deportations. In doing so, he again demanded an increase in federal employment:

"Sec. 7. Additional Enforcement and Removal Officers. The Secretary, through the Director of U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement, shall, to the extent permitted by law and subject to the availability of appropriations, take all appropriate action to hire 10,000 additional immigration officers, who shall complete relevant training and be authorized to perform the law enforcement functions described in section 287 of the INA (8 U.S.C. 1357)."

Since neither Border Patrol nor ICE is part of the military, and since his Memorandum left no exceptions, The Emperor has contradicted himself in writing, twice.

As with his deeply flawed foreign entry EO, it seems that no one has bothered to run these things past lawyers, or at least someone smarter than the average bear.

As with a deeply vain -- re: Narcissist -- person, The Emperor doesn't seem to be the type who would reissue an EO or Memo to correct the flaws, as it would be an explicit admission of failure -- and we know The Emperor has never admitted to failure.

That is one big reason why his foreign entry EO ended up in court. You can't simply reinterpret written words -- well, in this White House, apparently words have no concrete meaning -- as they can be re-reinterpreted at will, therefore.

His stupidity creates problems, but it is his vanity that prevents him from avoiding the courtroom.